Being Present in an Interview
I’m often asked what I believe to be the most important trait in a good interviewer. And I know off the cuff I’ve given many different answers: confidence, agility, and range among them. Each definitely important but the list is missing a key, and more subtle ingredient – presence. To be a great interviewer and to find those pieces of information that no one else will find, you need to be intently present in that interview. Presence is what makes confidence more than just an empty plan and allows agility and range to manifest.
If you are like me, the word presence, and worse, mindfulness, probably make you shudder a bit. They bring to my mind people who talk too softly, have a preference for gypsy pants, and might want me to perform a group rhythmic dance to help cure trauma I’m not aware of having. That all is pretty much the opposite of my thing. Still, being present and being mindful can make us so much better at interviewing and at our jobs and lives in general, and it doesn’t have to be such an annoying process to get there.
Being present in the interview sounds easy. Just listen, right? If only it were so easy. Think about the hundreds of stray thoughts that impose themselves on our thinking every minute. Right now, I’m writing this, and wondering why my shoulder hurts, whether I should have more coffee, if I’m properly prepared for my 10:00 a.m. call, and what my dogs are up to, among other things. Keeping all those thoughts at bay is hard, and it’s just as hard in a high stakes interview as it is sitting at my desk on a Tuesday morning…unless we practice.
Mindful practice leads to presence in the interview. When we are present, we respond appropriately, we create less resistance, we notice little hints that can move the interview in a new and more profitable direction, without pushing, and we create a more real connection with the person we are talking to.
Before we get to the practice, let’s talk about the science. Mindfulness practice, such as focused breathing meditation exercises, have been demonstrated in a wide range of studies to have both health and cognitive benefits. Notably, mindfulness practice reduces mind wandering, enhances attention, and improves working and recognition memory (see here and here for examples of the research). These are exactly the skills we need to be present and focused during an interview.
If you are up for 15 minutes a day of focused breathing and mindful meditation, I am confident this will have a notable impact on interview performance. But I also know that may not be everyone’s thing and many of us just don’t have the time. So, I’d like to recommend other ways we can practice mindfulness and develop better presence, in combination with what we already do each day.
If you work out regularly, my guess is you do it with headphones and music. This has the benefit of diverting our attention from the fatigue and pain of a workout, but it also diverts us from ourselves and the workout. Try ditching the headphones for a couple sessions a week and just focus on the workout. Focus on your breathing, focus on how your body feels, and on your posture, and where you feel tension and strain. And try to stay focused on this. As other thoughts come in, recognize them and then refocus on the workout and the sensations associated with the workout. The Uniformed Services University has a nice, short writeup discussing this further.
My favorite method is to practice mindful driving. I love driving and I love the feeling that comes from being intently focused on just that activity and the road around me. There is a reason I drive a manual transmission car and it’s not because I believe it gets better gas mileage or has more power. On the latter, I’m quite certain that it doesn’t. Rather, with a manual transmission I am more aware of the process of driving, can focus on that, focus on the road, the changes in the surface, the feel of the turns, the sensation of downshifting and upshifting, and all the rest of driving. As other thoughts intrude, I can recognize them, refocus on driving, and continue my practice. My hand on the gearshift connects my body to the vehicle and allows me to focus on the sensation of driving. Harvard Business Review has a great, expanded discussion of mindful driving.
With just a bit of creativity, you can probably find ways to practice mindfulness in all different aspects of your daily routine. With just a bit of effort and without having to sit barefoot in gypsy pants (unless that is your thing…then, cool), you should see notable changes in your attention and working memory, among other things, all of which translate into being a great interviewer.
